Coping with tweens - the confident "tween"ager!

If the period of adjustment to school life has gone well, you now face a confident child more secure with their friends and becoming less reliant on you, a possible source of pique!

And yet you are happy...for as they grow into their identity, you are continuing to successfully work yourself out of a job, from intensive parenting to perhaps a more relaxed parent faciltator...we hope!


Ages: 9-10
Levels: Primary 3/4

• Develops greater attention to friends, spending less time and effort on
previous interests like collections and hobbies.
• Boys tend to be very messy, probably leaving their clothes all over your house.
• Begins to look more to friends for their approval and less to you.  Beginning of adolescence, the hallmark of which is personal friendships.

How to help:

• Encourage your child to talk about their friends and if possible get to know them by inviting them over to your home; show interest in their activities.
• Look for the types of books that your child is showing an interest in reading. Join him to read the book and discuss the content.
• Consider a camp or scouting group where children can be in a positive setting with appropriate guidance and supervision. This will help promote team spirit and independence as well.
• Work together to find books and articles for assignments that children are engaged in at school. 


Ages: 10-11
Levels: Primary 4/5

• More conscious of what money can do, and more motivated by payment for jobs they previously did willingly.
• More aware of people’s problems, showing concern or curiosity over a friend's parent who is sick as they would be if it was their own.
• Shows interest in causes, a sign that your child is developing a social awareness. This is a practice for life.

How to help:

• Support their social conscience and show them that you appreciate their caring attitude.
• Help to direct their desire and energy by suggesting volunteer projects. Discuss with them to identify such projects and how they can volunteer. They may already be involved in such through school or church group activities.
• Go to an art or music festival to expose children to a wide range cultural experiences.

Coping with tweens - a primer
The early school years
From seniors to juniors